Shit Happens

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Not Masterbating Causes...Rape?

Kidney Stone Update:
Stones can be found in regular X-rays. I had to do a special dye X-ray because they were searching for stone remnants, not just used tampons. Dad is still cranky and not getting them zapped until Monday.

Gym Update
I did not make it to the gym AGAIN this morning, which means I have to go tonight, exhausted. I'm eating better, exercising, and taking vitamins. I don't understand why I am so tired. I worked my ass off last night, but only did 55 minutes of cardio. I am going to make an appt. with my doctor for suggestions/advice. I may enough for my insurance, I might as well take advantage of it.

Why are men's whitie-tighties so damn disgusting?? Women wear white cotton underwear, and as far as I know, it doesn't get gross. If it gets holy, they throw it out. It doesn't get stretched out and acquire skid marks. If it did, women are smart enough to know this is not an acceptable article of clothing and replace it.

Unless it's for athletic purposes, I don't think men should wear them regardless. They look silly even on the hottie models. But if it has to happen, at least keep an eye on them. Don't let them get like your socks, which is a whole other issue, which is easier for me to understand. (although I don't own a single pair of stained and/or holy socks)

I got to see my favorite custodian today and got some coffee. He is my favorite church employee. When I worked at the homeless shelter, I liked the residents so much better than my bosses. Why is this? It may be due to the fact that most of my bosses at the shelter were people of god. I mys prefer heathens.

Funny Story
When I worked at the homeless shelter this guy, Robert, was really concerned I would go to hell because I did not accept Jesus Christ as the son of god and my savior. Robert is a convicted rapist/murderer. Robert is so into god, now that he has found him, that he does not even masturbate. (I know, more information than I needed to know too)

Well, apparently not masturbating does bad things to a person, Robert was sent back to prison for attempted rape and hopefully never gets out. (how many chances can one person get??)


  • At 12:09 PM, Blogger stoli said…

    Not sure why whitie-tighties are so gross. They just are. Maybe the custodians whitie-tighties were too tight.

  • At 12:13 PM, Anonymous ella said…

    at first i was a little irritated by your writing, don't ask why, it was probably my stupidity... anyhow, after 10 seconds i really enjoyed reading... until the last paragraph... i got scared there, within the last 6 days i've come along this "except jesus as your savior" thing 3 times already... 2 times it directly approached me. first time someone just talked about his way and how it saved him and all, didn't even try to convince me, the second one did try to get me and of course this "second" person approaching me about this issue was reasoning to me that her talking to me about this, after someone else had done so just 2 days ago, was (of course) because god is obviously thinking of me and has an eye on me... now again 2 days later i have to read about it again... i wonder...

    .... i'm stopping here...

    i'm having a de-ja-vu...

    keep up the good writing! e.

  • At 12:17 PM, Blogger Marilyndrew said…

    stoli- i noticed this while doing my family's laundry, ihave NOT SEEN the custodians undies

    ella- love the name ella. and love critisim (on my writing at least!)
    maybe it's my poor spelling that got to you ;)

  • At 2:48 PM, Blogger olivia said…

    I just love how you wrote "holy" underwear. So if my undies have accepted Jesus as it's Lord, then I should throw them away...

    This is not a critcism, I just thought it was funny that you had both of those comments in one post! :)

  • At 10:28 PM, Blogger PDXScott said…

    Melissa, for a healthy debate on ginch, you may want to check this out.

    Warning: strong opinions expressed here!

  • At 4:03 PM, Blogger centuri0n said…

    You're right about tighty whities and wrong about Jesus. Not sure that's going to help you in the long run, but your blog came up as the "next blog" to mine and I thought I'd give you a word of encouragement.



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