Shit Happens

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Stolen good from non-girlfriend

My uncle once: threatened to kill my other uncle. Apparently, uncle #2 took uncle #1 seriously because he left the state.

Never in my life: been to a circus. Some take me to a flippin' circus goddamnit!

When I was five: My dad would threaten me when he was angry with me to give me "bare bottom spanking in the street". I was still a brat; I just learned to run faster.

High School was: hell. I just talk about the good stories now.

I once met: the daughter of Darryl Stermer, who plays in Phil Collins' band. It's my closest brush with celebrity. Unless you count touching Garth Brooks' foot.

There's this girl I know who: has the perfect ass. You know her. Give it a good smack for me.

Once, at a bar: I didn't drink ... that one time.

By noon I'm usually: hungry.

Last night: I went to the gym and watched some psychic show on court tv. It wasn't bad.

Next time I go to church I: I honestly don't plan on there being a "next time".

When I turn my head left, I see: A co-worker. I'm going to leave it at that.

When I turn my head right, I see: a wall of post-it "to-do" lists

You know I'm lying when: I hate you or feel really trapped.

What I miss most about the eighties: I DON'T miss the 80s!

If I ever go back to school I'll: make straight As this time. Seriously.

You know I like you if: I'm nice to you. I'm still a bitch, but the times I'm nice I overdo it. Make fun of me.

If I won an award, the first person I'd thank would be: my mom.

My ideal breakfast is: Bacon, egg and cheese sandwich

A love song I love, but do not have is: hoochie momma. A friend got me hooked on it HS and it's been a fave ever since.

If you visit my hometown, I suggest: you bring some change for all the homeless hippies

Why won't anyone invent: something that will make you happy. All the time. And ruining your life can't be a side affect.

If you spend the night at my house, don't: ask my the shower curtin is taped to the bathroom wall or why their are holes in the living room ceiling.

I'd stop my wedding for: a quickie in the bathroom with my finace's best man. (hah! that's what you get for asking)

The world could do without: war

My favorite blonde is: MARILYN MONROE

If I do anything well, it's: laugh, I love to laugh. smile

The last time I was drunk, I: took a drive to clear my mind. Just take my keys.

I brake for: animals, I would be the idiot who peeled the rabid, bloody dog off the pavement to bring him into the vet who can't save him, but will charge me at least a few hundred for the effort.


  • At 6:39 PM, Blogger JLHB said…

    Good answers, sport!

    The last time I went to the circus (last year), there were lots of protestors mad about the poorly kept animals and also about the pedophile clowns (I didn't realize that there was an actual reason for that until I heard about a pedophile clown a week later). I'll still take you if you want to go though.

    Also, I could see my uncles killing each other, but feeling bad about it later (quick tempers run on Daddy's side).

  • At 12:58 PM, Blogger Ali said…

    Great answers -- I love the wedding answer -- hahaha!

  • At 3:17 PM, Blogger boabhan sith said…

    LOL...that's great.
    I hate to say though...I've hit a couple of dogs. I refuse to get into an accident because someone can't keep their pooch in their yard...but...that's just who I am. if it was a turtle, I'd swerve, pull over, grab the turtle and place it back in it's wilderness home.

  • At 8:07 PM, Blogger kidcrush said…

    i stole your stolen item.

  • At 8:42 PM, Blogger Marilyndrew said…

    J- I wish I had been to one when I was young, before I knew about potential animla cruelty. Now, I feel kind of guilty sometimes supporting zoos, even though I love going.

    alit-Thanks. Getting married is nearly unimaginable to me. Which I pretend gives me lisence to say all kinds of horriable things what I would do if some guy was insane enough to marry me.

    bo-Don't tell me that!

    kid-Maybe I can still something from you so we are even.

  • At 1:59 PM, Anonymous stoli said…

    I can't believe you don't miss the 80s. At least, the music and the movies?

  • At 2:19 PM, Blogger Marilyndrew said…

    you got me on the 80s movies

    the music however ...

    hate it

  • At 10:55 AM, Blogger MYSTIC said…

    You have got to be kidding about not being to the CIRCUS...
    You might need a third job to pay for the POPCORN.

  • At 10:57 AM, Blogger Marilyndrew said…

    maybe i can get someone to take me on a circus date and buy my popcorn for me

    or maybe i should just start saving now ...


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