Shit Happens

Thursday, January 06, 2005


I just took the verbal part of a practice GRE test. I had PLENTY of time, which is reassuring, but I only got just over half correct!! Move over Edger Allan Poe. (phil, was that saying he's a retard, or that even outstanding literary figures don't score that high?)
I'm making a vocab list of some words I didn't know, but for the most part, that isn't the problem. The questions about the reading were hard, very trick-sy. And the analogies for trick-sy also, so I guess I need to work on those. I'm scared to even open the math part up, but even if I only go through some of it, it should help.
I still need to acually apply to UIS, go talk to them some more about my program, take the GRE, and fill out my FASFA form. Yeah, I'm on top of things...

The Mundane

Anna came over for dinner last night and then I pretty much went to bed around 7 or 8pm. Which was great, and I needed it, but it got me up at 8am this morning. As hard as I TRIED to go back to sleep, it wasn't happening. I contemplated going to the gym, but my nose is runny and I think my snot would fly around, so I did the laundry and some house cleaning, while watching the rest of the Godfather III.
After work, I plan to brave the snot and go to the gym anyway. I've been going and doing 45 minutes to an hour of cardio, thinking that I'm so out fo shape anything I do will help. But after about a month, I really haven't noticed any difference, so I'm going to have to break down very soon and meet with a personal trainer. Or, even worse, eat less/better.
I finally checked out Jessie's blog, and went to leave a comment. You can't!! What is a blog w/o comments?? Maybe there is a way to do it and I just didn't see it. She said she needs to take the GRE this month, which I also need to do, maybe she'll take some trips to B&N with me to study. I expect to get close to perfect on the verbal (as long as there isn't a spelling section!), but may not make it into the triple digits in math. Pretty sad, eh?

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

I'm on a Roll!

I swore the last time I go sick that I was going to spray everything I even thought about touching with lysol. Well, I never got around to buying a can and now I'm sick again! I think it's the beginning of a sinus infection, but maybe with enough decongestant and orange juice it will pass w/o me having to visit the docter. I hate going to the docter. They touch you and ask too personal questions and make you wear a backless, paper gown. Sounds like a third world torture form to me.
I went to the gym this morning; I even came close to running. INstead, I walked extra quickly. Running may be the next step. Minus this weekend, I have been smoking less, which is great. And going every other day or so had been building up my stanima, although I can't see any difference on my body yet. I may need to resort to a scale to make sure I am making some type of progress. I would go again tonight after dinner, but all my snot is draining into my tummy and it makes me feel nautious. Hopping around and nausia are a bad combination.
I want little Chrissy to go with me sometime to help me with the weight machines. I have used them all at Bradley before, but this is a different place. I don't know why I find them so intimidating. They just look complicated and it's in an open room where everyone can laugh at you. I like going in the morning though when the hot older guys come work out (40-50), the evenings have the younger ones who I would rather hide from while I am dripping in sweat and bopping around in my old t-shirt. The old men are old and I feel more forgiving.

Can We Just Cuddle?

It looks like I'll be at work all day today, so this may end up as post #2 of up to 5 or so. I realize that's border line crazy, but it would more than make up for the last few days I have missed. Take THAT Shoo and Kyle!
There has been some mentions of some New Years kisses and hook-ups. And I just posted an old poem on my art conspiracy page called "New Years 2002", from when I first hooked up with my ex-bf Kyle. Last year I went to Chicago with my girls and I think we all got our share of action. But this year I just chilled, more than content to spend time with my friends, drink too much, and dish out a few of my infamous ass-grabs.
Lately, I've been focusing on other things besides dating and men. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure I'm at a high risk from carpal tunnel from masturbating and I sometimes still think it would be nice "if....", but for the most part, I've been getting back in shape, showing my friends my love, and focusing on aspects of my life that don't involve dating or sex.
Last summer(?) I purposely went about 3 months w/o sex, I thought it would be good for me. And I think even then I "broke down" twice. Compared to college, between booze and actual boyfriends, twice in 3 months was nothing. I did accomplish something, even if it was not exactly what I set out to do.
Then, the past 6 months, I may have hooked up with a guy once-I even turned down the ex-repeat that has been on-and-off the past 2 years. (and this times it's probably for good) But as much as I love sex, and sincerely think that physical actions can be far separated from emotional feelings, I didn't really feel right about it, the casual hook-up.
First of all, I think if you're going to hook up with someone and not perform oral sex, you should warn them up front, so they can decide if they want to even spend the time getting it on. Maybe the person should have to fill out an entire questionnaire.
In reality, the real problem is that I'm "growing up" and decided to look at some things differently. I'll buy stock in a sex toy company, but this casual stuff now feels icky. I'm not on a moral high horse, anyone who knows me knows I keep my morals to a minimum (haha). I think life is like you do things as long as they work for you, try different things, and then decide which actions you want to continue. That's what I've done.
It sounds lame. I want to get laid.

sick again(?)

New Years turned out fantastic. Unfortunatly, I chose Monday night to finish off (the majority of) the left over liquer from my party. Yesterday SUCKED. I left work early to go home and nap. But then April took me out to dinner. I love April; she can take me out to dinner any day.
The formerly-hot-youth- pastor Ross has started calling me "Melissy". Although I think this sounds very similar to "pissy", I sort of think it is cute. Probably unprofessional, but cute.
Jayde told me her mom's boss was just waiting for a few more resumes before they hired me at the state, so it didn't look like I was favored. But I'm VERY qualified for the damn job, that's not playing favoriates. I'm planning to give them a call today and see if there is anyone else I should talk to or anything else I can do to improve my chances. Hopefully, I have a new job soon.
I just finished reading "A Widow for One Year", which was interesting. This lady hooks up with her husband's 16-yr-old writing assitant. Then, the mother ditches the 4-yr-old daughter, whom runs into the 16-yr-old later in life, whom is still in love with the mother, and now the grown daughter also. Irving (also the author of Cider House Rules) does and amazing job of creating stories w/in stories and coming up with interting plot twists, but the book is like 500 pages and I ended up skimming some of it toward the end. (I rarely do that) A lot of it could have been condensed and the fat cut.
Now I'm reading "The Secret Life of Bees", which Anna got me for Christmas. So far, so good.