Smoking Causes Cancer: I Can't Wait

Bloggerbitch just erased my entire post...

summary:

I like the Will Smith song "Switch". Maybe because Smill is "wholesomehot" (the opposite of Paris's "dirtyhot") Yes, I am appropriately embarrassed.

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Today I worried that I gave this girl Sarah enough gas money when she drove me home in HS. I haven't talked to her since then, but it was really nice of her to drive across town to take me.

If I let myself, I can worry about things like that all day. I know it's ridiculous, but I'll start to think about the time I slapped my brother when I was 12, which I think he still hasn't gotten over. All day the concerns will accumulate, until the knot in my stomach is huge.

I don't consider myself to be a big worrier, but I'll feel anxiety about the past. Things that I can't control and don't even matter. I don't believe in regret, so I won't call it that, but it's something.

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My car is still at the car doctor, I don't know what's wrong with it yet, sometimes it takes them a while, but I did find a purple convertible mini I want on line. I also researched porcelain veneers. I can't imagine being able to afford these things, but I'm going to be real prepared for whenever I can.

Blah Blah Blah

I did an hour of cardio last night at the gym, which is weak, considering I have been doing an hour and a half. Tonight I'll got back to an hour and a half. I think it will just be on the bike and ecliptical though, somehow I hurt my leg last night. It's not really bad, but when I walk I have a small shooting pain from the top of my left thigh to my ass. I assume it will go away on it's own in a day or two.

I tried two different skinny meals for lunch and ended up eating less then half of each. I knew I might not like them. one was taraki chicken and rice, and I don't think I actually like even non-cardboard taraki sauce, so that was a bust. The other was chicken and speghetti. I'm sure I thought I was just buying speghetti, which was the palatable part, the chicken was gross. I have another one to try tomorrow.

I sent out some resumes today. I'm going to call the lady about the job I interviewed tomorrow, if she hasn't called me. I assume if she hasn't called they decided on someone else, but it won't hurt to call.

Sometimes We Bond a Little Too Much

Last night I dropped my car off at the car docter and went to the gym.

Last night my 19-year-old brother went to Nelly with his girlfriend, her dad, and his girlfriend. His girlfriend has this crazy conservative, christian father who enojys spoiling his girlfriend. (who I believe is 30-40) Last week he bought his girlfriend $200 worth of Sex and City DVDs for for her and her friends to watch.

This week, the four of them are taking a limo up to P-town to Ludicris and Nelly. I assume the dad has never actually heard either of the "muscians". Or, he just plans on getting really drunk on the way up.

Generally, my bro's girlfriend lives at our house. Her and my mom are good buddies. They have weekly tv shows they watch together; I've caught them baking, and shopping together. I don't bake and shop with my mother.

I consider Jayde my younger, better looking, and liked, stand-in.

Some Thoughts

I wear glasses. Out of the house I usually wear contacts. But when I'm around the house and in my little nerd glasses, they sometimes leave a mark on the bridge of my nose, I assume where they sit. (they aren't the kinds with the little nose pad guys) Sunglasses do the same thing. I wonder if it my nose, or a common problem.

I bought cocoa butter to put on my skin. I LOOOOVE having soft skin, which is made evident by the number of times I touch myself each day. I think in real life, only pregnant people and black people use it. Actually, I just saw one black person with it one time, I don't know anything about black skin. It makes my skin feel moisturizer all day, but a little oily at night. My legs feel kind of like they stick together. So now I'm looking for something new.

They had to go in through my dad's pee hole to get out his kidney stones today. Mom said she thinks they just removed one and the others did/will pass. She said he wasn't really up for talking.

When my brother was just a wee little Chrissy they had to cut his pee hole bigger. I think I remember stitches. I probably shouldn't remember anything about my brother's penis and his surgery. He didn't pee straight for a while and it was real messy. He says everything is fine now.

I haven't drank anything (alcohol) since February 20th. It's not that bad. I just need to be busy doing other things while I'm in a bar. (like play darts, or make fun of my friends drunken kissy faces) I'm waiting for people to catch on and start asking me to drive all the time.

I need either a different day job (which I'm working on) or a night job. The gas station down the street is hiring. For some reason, I have always wanted to work at a gas station. Being broke has gotten beyond old. I wonder how I'd do it a holdup.

I have a (wussy) carpet in my bedroom, but my bed still slides across the floor and hits against the wall. Not even necessarily during heavy "use"; it just slides. The wheel is suppose to be "locked", but it still moves. I need to find something, some more appealing than cinder blocks, to keep it stationary.

Escape From Neverland

http://www.ichhabkeininternet.de/flash/spiele/neverland.swf

I only got to level 2, but supposedly things get "good" at level 4.

I'm scared.

Thank You Letter #2

This is what I decided on. Just say you would hire me.

Dear,

It was very enjoyable speaking with you on Friday. I appreciate the time that you took to interview me for this opportunity.

The communications specialist position is a good match for my background and interest in both creative, and professional, writing. At Bradley University I enrolled in an extensive array of writing classes; those classes, in addition to my employment experience, make me an ideal candidate for this opening. I would really enjoy performing the writing, editing, and proofreading tasks associated with this position.

Please contact me if you need any additional writing samples. I will call you in a few days for more news of your selection.

Thanks again!

Sincerely yours,

Thank You Letter (I need help!)

It's early. I'm dead and can't come up with anything better. Any suggestions on how to improve the content of this thank you letter?

Thanks!

Dear,

Thank you for taking the time to talk to me on Friday. I appreciate the time that you took to interview me for this interesting opportunity.

I am excited by the interest that H.M. has shown in me as a potential employee. I am confident that I have the experience and tools necessary to succeed as a Communications Specialist. I feel that my writing experience and outside interests are a good match for your needs and I know that I would enjoy performing the duties of the position on a day-to-day basis

I will call you in a few days for more news of your selection. Thanks again.

Sincerely yours,

I've Never...

I stole this from www.offkilter.blogspot.com

I've never...

(The things in bold are true.)

1)I’ve Never Kissed A Member Of The Opposite Sex
2)I’ve Never Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex
3)I’ve Never Crashed A Friend’s Car
4)I’ve Never Been To Japan
5)I’ve Never Been In A Taxi
6)I’ve Never Been In Love
7)I’ve Never Had Sex In Public
8)I’ve Never Been Dumped
9)I’ve Never Done Cocaine
10)I've Never Shoplifted
11)I’ve Never Been Fired
12)I’ve Never Been In A Fist Fight
13)I’ve Never Had Group Intercourse
14)I’ve Never Snuck Out Of My Parents’ House (never successfully!)
15)I’ve Never Been Tied Up
16)I’ve Never Regretted Having Sex With Someone
17)I’ve Never Been Arrested
18)I’ve Never Made Out With A Stranger
19)I’ve Never Stolen Something From My Job
20)I’ve Never Celebrated New Years In Time Square
21)I’ve Never Gone On A Blind Date
22)I’ve Never Lied To A Friend
23)I’ve Never Had A Crush On A Teacher
24)I’ve Never Celebrated Mardi Gras In New Orleans (twice!)
25)I’ve Never Been To Europe
25)I’ve Never Skipped School
26)I’ve Never Slept With A Co-Worker
27)I’ve Never Cut Myself On Purpose
28)I’ve Never Had Sex At The Office
29)I’ve Never Been Married
30)I’ve Never Been Divorced
31)I’ve Never Had Sex With More Than One Person Within The Same Week
32)I’ve Never Posed Nude
33)I’ve Never Gotten Someone Drunk Just To Have Sex With Them
34)I’ve Never Killed Anyone
35)I’ve Never Received Scars From My Sex Partner
36)I’ve Never Thrown Up In A Bar (ok, not that I remember)
37)I’ve Never Purposely Set A Part Of Myself On Fire
38)I’ve Never Eaten Sushi
39)I’ve Never Been Snowboarding
40)I’ve Never Had Sex At A Friend’s House While They Were Throwing A Party
41)I’ve Never Had Sex In A Dressing Room
42)I’ve Never Flashed Anyone
43)I’ve Never Met Anyone From Online
44)I've never been to a circus
45) I've never seen/had an encounter with a ghost

Out of the 23 I've "never done", I only want to do 10- can you guess which?

Humor Me (please)

I know I complain about church work. But in real life, the pastor is super nice and they take a positive spin on things.

So Pastor Bob (not his real name) comes in my office today, asking me what would encourage my generation to come to church. My first reaction, again, is to laugh. But the poor guy really is sincere in his attempts not to be judgmental and help people out. That's more that can be said for a lot of people.

So I said I would ask some friends:

What would encourage you come to church?

Why don't you presently go to church?

Which things are you unhappy about with church as you've been exposed to it?

My answers aren't fit to repeat, so I don't expect yours to be either, but if you have any ideas, leave me a comment.

Thanks!

Insomnia

Last night I COULD NOT SLEEP. I was awake until at least 4:30am.

This means I woke up at 7:20, and got ready for work in 15 minutes.

Morning Routine
1. Fed cat, put herpes drops in his eye
2. Got dressed
3. Washed face
4. Put pin in my hair
5. Grabbed some water and a vitamin

I'm the only one in on Mondays and enjoy being as dirty as I please.

Life w/o Sex

It's not easy to make me feel uncomfortable.

But some people have a special uncomfortable skills, or just not read others very well. (called alcohol) I think it was the latter this weekend. After I broke up with a bf about 4 years ago, a friend and I casually hooked up for like month, but didn't sleep together.

My friend and I hadn't really talked about what happened afterwards, because there was nothing to talk about. (as far as I was concerned) I knew he had had a crush on me for a while before that and still thought about me afterwards (since he had mentioned he thinks about me when he jacks off in the shower- everyone should be allowed their indulgences ;), but I thought it was a non-issue since he has had a live-in girlfriend for the past 3 years.

I was wrong.

This weekend we're hanging out, he's drinking (I didn't), I'm getting killer backrubs, and even some ear nibbles. I'm a whore for backrubs, so that part was great. I thought the ear nibbling was a joke or just for fun.

But by the end of the night this progressed into "How do you feel about me?". Specifically, "Would you ever sleep with me?". To, "Would you consider sleeping with me tonight?"

AT first I made a joke out of it, but he wanted real feelings about what had happened between us and if I would ever consider anything in the future. Things with his girlfriend haven't been going so well for a while. They've only had SEX ONCE ALL YEAR. (that's a little over 2 months, but still unfathomable to me)

I didn't want to make him feel weird so I was like, "Sure, maybe if things didn't work out with your girlfriend I would consider something with you". Maybe I would, you never know what is going to happen. Then he confessed he hasn't been completely faithful to her. I told him that was a big, red flashing sign that they needed to break up.

That wasn't enough. He wanted to know if I was leaning toward yes, or no. He made some comments about how hard it is to transition between being in a relationship to being single, so I thought maybe he wanted to know if I was an "option" if he broke up with the girl. Which wasn't ok, but he had been drinking and I just blew it off.

unfortunately, it progressed into something about right now. Like getting it on now. I still tried to play it off, "You break up with so-and-so and call me and we'll see". He was like, "I would have to be broke up?" YES

Then I was in a hurry to leave but my friends were making out in the back of the bar; I couldn't pry them apart. He said when he had cheated before he had been very drunk and it wasn't sex.

Like that's OK!

I love my friends, no matter what they do in their dating lives, but I'm not into being a part of screwing up someone else's relationship. I've been in a relationship, blacked out, obliterated drunk, and still didn't cheat. It's still a decision you make, get over the excuses.

And don't be creepy and make me feel weird!!

Please