Shit Happens

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

more untitled poetry!

This is a revision of something I wrote during the past year. I don't think I've posted it before and it definitely fits my "long poem" theme.

Stabbing into me
severing my legs
apart, entering my exposed
gut (a fish leaking
and torn) I don't want to scare
you so I gasp
softly, urgently as if your body left mine
a choice. You comply
knifing me
premeditated (presumed sane) the way
you rest before going
at it again. Ignoring the steady
stream of dripping


  • At 2:16 PM, Blogger pvherrig said…

    This is... I don't know excactly what to say... At first it reminds me of some Six Feet Under lyrics, but then again, obviously it is not. It is something else. I like it. Very strong poetry I think. A little frightning. If I ever have a 16 year old daughter, can I show this to her before she goes on her first date?

  • At 2:55 PM, Blogger Marilyndrew said…

    Thanks, I think.

    I've never heard of 6 feet under, so it wasn't influenced by them.

    I've been a 16-year-old daughter, I wouldn't recomend having one of your own ;)

  • At 3:09 PM, Blogger pvherrig said…

    Didn't think your poem was inspired by them, afterall they are some heavy/death metal band I used to hear in my younger years. They still make albums though, but they are very far out, specially if you read the lyrics. Nevermind them, I shouldn't have spend all that time reading their lyrics anyway.

    But I do think it is a good poem, got me thinking, thinking about lot's of stuff.

  • At 11:54 PM, Blogger George Larson said…

    I'd like to see a little more visual variation.

    More the words around.

    Bukowski, or Elliot.

    Most importantly, read a lot of poetry. It helps you find yourself.

  • At 8:01 AM, Blogger Marilyndrew said…

    GL - Thanks for the input!

    I LOVE Bukouski's novels but his poetry is awful! Interesting that you suggested reading his work.

    My faves are Sharon Olds and Anne Sexton.

  • At 8:01 PM, Blogger George Larson said…

    Don't like Buk's poetry?!?!

    Them's fightin' words!


Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home