Shit Happens

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Things I've learned in the past two days:

1) It is possiable to sneak both lighters and vodka in a carry-on, through airport security
2) Regardless of the fact that I am NOT carrying drugs, the dogs make me damn nervous
3) All the cute men you're not seeing around town - yeah, they're hanging out in the airport
4) Graduates from my tiny, liberal arts college do occationally leave the midwest. (I sat next to a 1970 alum on the plane)
5) Continually pouring liquid from small liquer bottles into your drinks will discourage row-mates from making small talk with you
6) I still hate small children and don't think they should be alloud in most public places uncaged and without a mussel
7) The entire state of WA is non-smoking
8) 20-year old boys DO NOT clean their bathroom for visiters, no matter how much they love them
9) Compared to a pre-school teacher, I sure swear a fuck of a lot



10) This is home.
I can't believe it's been four years.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Family bonding

Mom: "Did you take the crossword from the paper this morning?"
Me: "Yes."
Mom: "Make sure to cut it out next time. You took the dead people."
Me: "The dead people?"
Mom: "Yes, I need to see the dead people. As people get older, they start checking to see who died."
Me: "So is it a good day when there are few deaths, because more of your friends are still around? Or is it better when more people die, so the quota is filled and your odds look better?"
Mom: "I don't know. It doesn't make me sad to read them. I just need to count them."